Our pastors are taking us through a series called Margin. Margin is the space between our load and our limit. We need margin in our lives to keep us from getting overloaded and to help us make the best choices in life. We also need margin in our lives to help us deal with how we feel. Good things in life happen in our margin space.
This post is taken from my personal Bible study notes during my pastor's sermon titled, "How To Deal With How You Feel."
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| How To Deal With How We Feel |
Think of life like a fuel gauge. Some people will refill the tank when they reach the 3/4 full mark (like me). Others will run on fumes before refilling the tank (like my husband). Everyone else fits somewhere in between. The more fuel we have in our tanks, the more margin space we have to make the best choice about when to refill. When the fuel tank runs near empty, there is little margin space. That's when the stress sets in. Don't allow this to happen in your real life, not in your walk with the Lord or in your relationships. We need spiritual margin and relationship margin. We need financial margin. We have to watch that fuel gauge.
Today, we are talking about emotional margin. Without emotional margin, we can become emotionally unhealthy. People are struggling. Here are some things people are struggling with.
1. Sadness
2. Anger
3. Bitterness
4. Loss
5. Grief
6. Hurt
These emotions creep into the margin of our lives. Emotions are God-given and are good but when they become unhealthy, they can hurt us. Sometimes they can take our lives away.
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Deadly emotions are life killers and margin thieves. Negative emotions will eat up our margin space. Negative emotions can steal margin space from other areas of our lives. Sometimes we impulse buy to medicate our emotional stress, for example. This creates less financial margin space. Negative emotions create negative feelings. Let's talk about how to deal with how we feel and let's start with scripture.
The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came so that they would have life, and have it abundantly. “I am the good shepherd; the good shepherd lays down His life for the sheep." John 10:10-11
In this passage, Jesus is talking about the devil. Jesus tells us three things about him. He is a:
1. Murderer
2. Thief
3. Destroyer
Let's think about our emotions. For those of us who are believers, if the devil can't drag our souls to hell, he will make us feel like hell emotionally. If the devil can't kill us, he will defeat us. He'll mess with our minds. He'll steal our joy and our peace of mind by going after our emotions.
Jesus came to give us life and abundant life in the here and now. The Lord wants us to have joy and peace. He wants us to have emotional margin but we have to learn how to deal with how we feel.
How To Deal With How We Feel
God gives us three tools to teach us how to deal with how we feel.
2. Worship
3. Prayer
God's Word, worship, and prayer are three tools God gives us to deal with unhealthy emotions. Anytime we are reading the Bible, God is talking to us. Do you want to hear the voice of God? Read the Bible out loud. We speak to Him through prayer. One way to worship is through worship songs.
The Emotion of Rejection
Do you feel rejected? People who feel rejection often feel worthless. We don't want to be rejectors either. We need to love others as Jesus does.
So He came to a city of Samaria called Sychar, near the parcel of land that Jacob gave to his son Joseph; and Jacob’s well was there. So Jesus, tired from His journey, was just sitting by the well. It was about the sixth hour.
The Woman of Samaria
A woman of Samaria came to draw water. Jesus said to her, “Give Me a drink.” John 4:5-7
Jesus and his disciples had traveled to a place called Samaria. The disciples had gone into town for food but Jesus was there at the well. At noon, a woman came to draw water. Back then, women didn't go to the well at noon because it was the hottest time of the day. Something wasn't right with this woman. The women in the community would go to the well early in the morning, but this woman came at noon because she felt rejected by the other women.
This woman was shocked that Jesus spoke to her. Back then, men didn't speak to other women and Jews didn't speak to Samaritans. Jesus was both a man and a Jew. Yet He spoke to her. He offered here water so that she would never thirst again. Of course, she would want that so Jesus said, "Go get your husband."
The woman said, "I don't have a husband."
Jesus said, "You're right. You've had 5 and now you are living with a man who is not your husband."
She wanted to know how Jesus would know this. Jesus revealed to her that He was the Messiah and healed this woman of her emotional rejection. He gave her forgiveness, love, acceptance and she became a child of God.
Then she ran into town to the very people she had been avoiding before those precious moments with Jesus. He had healed her and she couldn't wait to tell others about Him. Many people in Samaria came to know Jesus because of this woman's testimony.
Your past does not define you!
Your stupid decisions do not have to be carried into the future.
God can use all of our brokenness for His glory.
Therefore there is now no condemnation at all for those who are in Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1
Let the pride, bitterness, and resentment go.
But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, to those who believe in His name. John 1:12
The Emotion of Grief
Grief is not rare. Most of us are experiencing grief or we are close to someone who is. When grief is large, it can take away our margin space so that we don't get the help and encouragement we need. We might start isolating ourselves instead of reaching out for help.
Now as He approached the gate of the city, a dead man was being carried out, the only son of his mother, and she was a widow; and a sizable crowd from the city was with her. When the Lord saw her, He felt compassion for her and said to her, “Do not go on weeping.” Luke 7:12-13
At this time, Jesus and His disciples were walking and came by this funeral. Jesus had compassion on this woman because He knew that she was a widow and her only son had just died. In Biblical historical times, a woman with no husband and no children was a serious situation. She was all alone.
Do you feel alone today? Are you grieving a loss?
Grief and loss are not always due to a death but also a broken relationship. The Lord has compassion for you.
The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18
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| This Psalm 34:18 scripture print is available here. |
When we grieve, the Lord grieves with us.
A father of the fatherless and a judge for the widows is God in His holy dwelling. Psalm 68:5
God has not lost sight of you. He sees you. He feels your grief.
Turn your pain into praise.
To grant those who mourn in Zion,
Giving them a garland instead of ashes,
The oil of gladness instead of mourning,
The cloak of praise instead of a disheartened spirit.
So they will be called [a]oaks of righteousness,
The planting of the Lord, that He may be glorified. Psalm 61:3
Who does this for us? A good, good Father.
One thing about grief . . . we will never grieve the absence or the death of God because He is a good, good Father who will never leave us.
The Emotion of Fear
Jesus Calms the Storm
When He got into the boat, His disciples followed Him. And behold, a violent storm developed on the sea, so that the boat was being covered by the waves; but Jesus Himself was asleep. And they came to Him and woke Him, saying, “Save us, Lord; we are perishing!” He said to them, “Why are you afraid, you men of little faith?” Then He got up and rebuked the winds and the sea, and it became perfectly calm. The men were amazed, and said, “What kind of a man is this, that even the winds and the sea obey Him?” Matthew 8:23-27
Our pastor asked us the same thing Jesus asked them, "Why are you afraid?
For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7
Whatever fear you are feeling . . .
Failure?
Finances?
Health?
God holds this world in His hands. He holds us. He holds our families. He holds our jobs, our futures - so what fear today is robbing you of your margin space?
Let it go today.
The Emotion of Doubt
Jesus among His DisciplesNow when it was evening on that day, the first day of the week, and when the doors were shut where the disciples were together due to fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood in their midst, and said to them, “Peace be to you.” And when He had said this, He showed them both His hands and His side. The disciples then rejoiced when they saw the Lord. John 20:19-20
Thomas wasn't there. When negative emotions run away with us, we tend to isolate ourselves from our groups.
When we are full of doubt, the devil loves to isolate us. When wild animals attack their prey, they rarely attack a herd. They will usually attack the lone critter who is isolated from the pack. The lone critter is most vulnerable. The lone critter is easy prey. When we isolate ourselves from others, from our Christian brothers and sisters, from our church family, we are easy prey for our enemy, the devil.
Thomas shows up with his doubts. He needed proof.
But Thomas, one of the twelve, who was called Didymus, was not with them when Jesus came. So the other disciples were saying to him, “We have seen the Lord!” But he said to them, “Unless I see in His hands the imprint of the nails, and put my finger into the place of the nails, and put my hand into His side, I will not believe.”
Eight days later His disciples were again inside, and Thomas was with them. Jesus came, the doors having been shut, and stood in their midst and said, “Peace be to you.” Then He said to Thomas, “Place your finger here, and see My hands; and take your hand and put it into My side; and do not continue in disbelief, but be a believer.” Thomas answered and said to Him, “My Lord and my God!” Jesus said to him, “Because you have seen Me, have you now believed? Blessed are they who did not see, and yet believed.” John 20:24-29
Any time you think God doesn't love you, go to the cross. When you think God doesn't care about your marriage, your finances, your relationships, your grief, your loss, your broken heart . . . go to the cross
But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8
And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9
God gives grace abundantly! You'll never run out of God's grace.
Speak the name of Jesus. We are victors in his name!
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| How To Deal With How We Feel |
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